Tuesday, July 13, 2010

His is bigger than yours

Thanks to Clementine Ford (aka Audrey Apple) for alerting me on Facebook to this extraordinary item about penis size.

You'd think it would have to be a joke, but they sound deadly serious to me. And you'd think that they'd be aware by now that penis size tends to vary depending on what you happen to be doing at the time, and if they're going to get a girl to measure their bits, then, well, you know.

Why do they want to know? And what do they plan to do with this information once they have it? It's already clear that neither of them trusts his girlfriend, or each other, so obviously this is a rocky quartet of relationships to start with. Have they given even a moment's thought to the effect this little exercise is going to have on their friendship? It looks to me as though what they really want is to never speak to each other again, but you'd think in that case they could just do it, in the Nike spirit, and save themselves the fifty bucks.

Men are weird.

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

Good grief. There'll be tears before tea time. I disagree that it's only men who are weird. I have had another woman whip out a breast to prove how much better hers were than mine. By two different women. I would have given ground without the demo. Srsly.

Ann ODyne said...

$50 ? they could get Father O'Buggery down at St.Mick's to compare them for free.

I reckon it's a plot with a subversive ulterior motive, else they could easily photograph their own with their phones FFS

The Honourable Husband said...

If it were fifty bucks plus airfare, I'd wear a dress and fake it.

Zoe said...

I think they DO want to see each other's penises. A lot.

Kerryn Goldsworthy said...

Oh but Anon, I would never ever argue that only men are weird.

Z, I think you're definitely onto something.

Ann ODyne said...

we all do. that's why we've been watching HUNG on Monday nights. Follow the link to an unprecedented TEN+ pages at the Discussion Thread, where viewers are assessing exactly what length does comprise 'hung'.

Bernice said...

Should we suggest they both don speedos three sizes too small and turn up at a Liberal Party pre-selection meeting?

Mindy said...

Hubby read this last night and reckons that there are no girlfriends and these guys are just desperate for some poor girl to look!

fxh said...

So... We just need a girl to look at both of our penises (individually) and then to both of our faces say which one is bigger. We can't pay much. $50

They could just post a photo and I could say which one of their faces is bigger.

Mindy said...

Actually after being rudely over charged $50 by Europcar I'd happily take their $50 and lie to them both. "Oh, wow, I'm a little embarrassed to say I've never seen anyone so large up this close." Everyone's happy then. Until they talk to each other.

Special K said...

As a psychologist, I have to understand and profess...the idiosnychrony of all humans...in such a patterned, conformed manner.
We are all about comparing...in order to be set apart...in order to FIT in...
Strange, huh?

librarygirl said...

I am without speech.

Anonymous said...

I agree (those) men are weird.

Helen said...

Speaking of Hung, Ann, the wonderfully named Lorelei Vashti writes some great stuff about peni in the latest Green Guide. This had me LOLing on the train. I wonder who she really is!

w/v: Suppefev, a dish created by starstruck Masterchef contestant dedicated to Brendan Fevola.